When kids are mean.

The other day at a play group I was sitting around chatting with some of the other moms when I overheard Haylee and a group of kids behind me talking.

I better start off by saying Haylee is only 2 years old but she is as tall as most 4 and 5-year-old children. Naturally, she gravitates to those kids who are the same size as her which happen to be those who are 2-3 years older.

So here we are at a play group, Haylee is running around with the 5-year-old group when I hear one of the kids say "Haylee, say something", then another "Come on, talk Haylee". One kid then said loudly "Guys, she's not smart, she can't even talk." followed by "Yeah, she's dumb."

When I heard that last comment my heart broke, I seriously was on the verge of tears.  I was so sad and hurt, I wanted to turn around and yell at those kids letting them know that Haylee is smart, she's only 2, she gets shy when put on the spot, and she's learning.   My "mama bear" was out in full force.

As I turned around, I saw Haylee sitting with the kids, and I realized a couple of things. I realized that those kids are only 4 & 5 and they didn't say it trying to be mean and they weren't intentionally trying to hurt her feelings. I also noticed that, luckily, the comment didn't even phase her. All the children promptly got up called for Haylee to follow them and they continued to play like nothing happened.

I sat there seriously choked up because I didn't even want to think about my child being hurt or bullied. I didn't want her to even know the feeling of having being called a name, or put down.  Because let's be honest, it sucks.

You know that saying "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me." It's a lie. Words do hurt, and they can hurt badly.

Unfortunately, in the future there will be bullies, those who intentionally want to hurt my kids' feelings. I wish I could always be a mama bear and be right next to them, ready to jump and defend them at all times. I wish I could be at their side constantly cheering them on, telling them how awesome they are.  But I can't.

I can be their biggest cheerleader, I just have to do it from the sidelines.

I dread the day when they'll come home from school in tears because someone was mean to them. I'll cry right along with them, if not harder.  I dread the day when they start even considering that what other people say is true.

Kids will be mean. Teenagers will be mean. And, unfortunately, adults will be mean.

My goal as a mother is to teach my kids that they are important, that they are loved no matter what, that they are smart, that they can accomplish anything with hard work and determination, that they are beautiful regardless of the "world's standards", that being kind is more important than being popular, and that they'll never be alone.

My role as a mother is essential in helping them build up their self confidence and realizing their self worth, and that's a huge responsibility.

So today I'll tell my kids they're important. I'll praise them when they succeed, I'll encourage them when they fail. I'll tell them I love them. I'll teach them to be a friend and to never ever be a bully. I'll teach them to stand for what is right.

My spot may only be on the sidelines but I can cheer very, very loud.

Bedtime...

The other day we were up in Logan at Lance's parents house and we were discussing bedtime routines.

We had just put Haylee down for bed and after having her run out of the room multiple times we ended up getting a tie-down to tie the door shut so she couldn't escape.

They were all laughing at the steps we had to take in order for her to stay in bed. I made the comment "She's actually pretty good, she usually goes right to bed at home." 

Lance began to laugh...

He then began to list off the steps that we take each night to get Haylee to sleep. Having him list out all the steps I realized bedtime at our house is ridiculous.

No, seriously. RIDICULOUS. The things we have to do in order to keep our wild, crazy two year old in her room each night is pretty extensive.

Each night starts our peaceful with Haylee and Avery having a blast splashing and playing in the bathtub together.

Pajama time is next.  Safety pinning the zipper up is required due to her tendency to become a nudist at night.

We brush her teeth then give her a glass of water because we know from experience that the minute we shut her door she will ask for a drink.

We then go into her room and make sure her room is completely clean. She will not sleep if anything is left out on her floor.

We remove all her "big" toys so she won't play with them. These toys are placed in the hallway outside her door.

After removing all toys and making sure they are out of her sight we go through the room and lock up all cabinets, closets, anything that she can open and get items out of.

Next step... scripture reading, prayer time and kisses and hugs.

Haylee then insists she "makes Avery laugh" for a few minutes. This is a crucial step. This can seriously make or break our night. If Avery refuses to sit still why Haylee does everything she can to make Avery clap, giggle,shake her head, basically do anything, Haylee will throw a fit.

After making Avery laugh we move onto the next step where Haylee makes us sing the  "I Love You, You love me" song. Lance and I have to sing it separately complete with hugs and kisses then Haylee has to take a turn singing it to Avery.

Finally we are ready for bed.

Once tucked in and the lights are off she gets to choose one more song for us to sing. While we sing Lance sneaks down the hall and flips the breaker and cuts the power to her room. Yes, we cut all power to our child's room. We've tried tape and even countless layers of duck tape. She still manages to turn on the light and run around her room. Cutting the power is the only way we can make sure the light stays off.

The last step in our crazy night is to tie her door shut with the door across the hall so she can't open it.

I know that the steps with take are probably excessive but honestly I've adopted the mentality of "Whatever Works". I can either fight her and have to put her back in her room a million times or I can do a few extra steps to make my life a bit easier.

Come 8:30 each night I'm done being a mom for the day and am in desperate need for me-time. If crazy routines are what it takes for me to achieve me-time sooner. So be it.

Mobile Baby, Two is Hard.

It's official. Avery is mobile. I both love and hate this.

I love it because it is adorable and so much fun to watch her explore.

I hate this because it means she is getting bigger. And I have once again realized how unsafe my house is. It's crazy how you have to baby proof for each age. I feel like it's on-going process.

Avery has always been a mommies girl and her being mobile only reiterates this. She attempts to follow me through the house like a puppy and whines if I walk too fast away from her. She's adorable.

Haylee is trying to be a little mommy and it's honestly so ANNOYING! It's cute some of the time but she insists on determining on what is and isn't OK for Avery to play with. She is yelling at Avery constantly telling her no. I'm still trying to figure out how to stop this.  I am constantly telling her I'm the Mommy and while I appreciate her help, she needs to ask me and come to me first before she takes something away from Avery.

I'm convinced I'm never having a clean house again. Avery attacks and pulls out anything low to the ground and Haylee climbs and get anything out of reach. It's like they are a team conspiring against me to make it so I have to constantly clean.

I've resorted to living in a messy house and cleaning once they go to bed so Lance and I can enjoy a few hours of peace in a clean home.

I won't even start talking about bedtime with Haylee. I'll sum up our experience with one word. Nightmare.

Having two kids going in two different directions is hard. And having a two year old is plain exhausting.

But, I love it.

Good day.

Today was one of those days where I kept on thinking over and over how grateful I am to be the mom of these two little girls.

While we were out shopping Avery started getting fussy in the car so Haylee took it upon herself to cheer her up. She got Avery's attention, started making silly noises while shaking her body and hitting herself in the head. She looked hilarious and Avery broke out laughing hysterically. Once Avery started laughing Haylee broke out in a fit of giggles. They continued this for about 10 minutes. I don't think there are many things that sound better then your child laughing. I kept peaking in the rear-view mirror with the biggest smile on my face.

I love being a mom. Even during the bad days, or during our nightly fight at bed-time. I love watching my kids play, smile, and laugh together. I'm so excited to watch them grow up together and become best friends. I love them.

A little life update

First of all, is it really December?  I am LOVING this weather. Seriously 53 degrees in December?? Yes please! And holy cow we've been in Utah over 7 months now. We are absolutely loving being back. Being so close to family has been so much fun. It is so nice to be able to participate in the little family get-together's and not have to miss out by being across the country.  I absolutely love the relationship Haylee has with her grandparents. She constantly asks for them and her aunt Steffy, and never wants to leave their houses when we're there.

Lance is busy with school but he is loving it. He has had some really cool opportunities so far that he has been able to participate in. In October he was invited by Nestle to their headquarters to attend their Brand Management Boot Camp. He learned a lot and met some great people. He even won one of the competitions that resulted in him winning a coffee maker. We sold it on ebay for $100 :)  He is learning so much and I'm hoping it pays off in the end with a good paying job. He did give in and buy a Utah Ute shirt that he wears occasionally but he wears his Utah state stuff to school most days. I got a Ute pullover as well and I still have yet to wear it out of the house...I feel like i'm cheating on USU.

I'm staying at home with our two little ones. They are crazy and it is so much work. I made the decision recently to go back to school and finish up my Degree in Family Life Studies. The plan was to start this Spring semester and graduate in the Fall. However, because I'm not a Utah resident any more, tuition is triple the amount. So I'm going to wait 2 more months, get residency, then start in the summer. This means I'll graduate in the spring with Lance.

Now onto the girls, this very well could take up an entire blog post itself. They are absolutely adorable, crazy, fun, loving, and exhausting.

Haylee seriously wakes up running and doesn't stop till I put her down for her nap. Then it begins again and continues until she goes to bed at night. I've learned that terrible two's are a real thing and there is absolutely no sense in trying to negotiate and compromise with a two year old.  There are lots of tears and tantrums (some even by me) in our house but we are slowly getting through it.

Even though having  a two year old is hard the good times completely out shine the bad. She keeps us laughing constantly.

Let see....some of the things she has done recently.......
-Whenever we sneak up on her or catch her doing something she's not supposed to do she exclaims "Oh! Mommy! You scared me!"
-She insists on wearing the same color of shoes I'm wearing, Putting on lipstick and lotion whenever I do, and she begs for perfume on a daily basis. Then she proceeds to do the "smell good dance" that her aunt and her came up with when they put on perfume.
-She is a little Mommy and tries to boss Avery around and take care of her herself.
-She insists on getting naked whenever she can. especially during nap/bedtime because she knows we then have to come into her room and get her dressed.
-She asks everyday if she can go to church.
-She doesn't even sit by us at church any more. The C.O.O of the Utah Jazz is in our ward and Haylee has somehow managed to adopt them and their teenage kids as her own and insists on sitting with them each Sunday. They love her and she is WAY more reverent sitting with them then she is with us so we are totally OK with it!
-She sings her little heart out all day long and it is the cutest thing ever
-She wears her Elsa dress more than her regular clothes and insists on watching Frozen everyday
-She can proudly name pretty much every Disney princess, and finds it fun to randomly list them throughout the day. Tiana is her favorite and we watch Princess and the frog constantly (Prince Naveen is a hunk).

Now onto Avery
Avery is a chunk, and the happiest baby ever. She is mellow, quiet, and just wants to be loved and cuddled. She constantly smiles and loves her sister.
She has been sitting up since about 4 1/2 months which is way sooner then Haylee did and she is already starting to try and crawl.
She loves eating and I'm praying she isn't going to be a picky eater like her sister.
She mainly spends her day rolling around the house, pulling Haylee's hair, eating, giggling, and being cute.
She is a total Momma's girl which I LOVE!

Already Best Friends!

Basically that is what has been going on as of late. I'm pretty much a single mom because Lance is gone so much but luckily things should slow down a bit next semester. Overall we are doing great, and we are loving Salt Lake.

The First Month

I really need to find some time to blog at least once a week. So many things are happening with this little girl and she is changing so much!

Being parents is absolutely the funnest, hardest, most emotional exhausting, but greatest thing in this world! We are having so much fun and are completely obsessed with this little one.

It is crazy how fast she is growing up. She is starting to smile more, make little noises, and her personality is starting to show.

Here's some pics of the first month:

Taking her home

First week home

She has the cutest sleeping positions

Saying Goodbye to Grandpa Duncan and Aunt Steffy

Her favorite sleeping spot.

Happy girl

Getting so big!

First full day at church.

We are having so much fun! We took her to her first Indians Game the other night, The Indians lost but we still had so much fun! I'll post pictures later.